Whipping around, I saw Kris Beckley smiling at me …

My history book dropped to the floor with a glorious flutter of pages and a “flappity flap” sort of noise. Standing in front of my locker, I bent to pick it up, then reached for my Junior Trigonometry book from the shelf.

“Uh … Amanda Fagen, right?” came a deep voice from behind me. Whipping around, I saw tall, blond Kris Beckley, a senior, smiling down at me.

“Yeah, that’s me,” I replied, shutting my locker door. Kids were noisily bustling about, trying to get to their next class.

“Ah … well … Amanda,” he began a little awkwardly, “I wanted to know if you’d like to go out with me.”

“You want me to go out with you?” I repeated, feeling puzzled. I thought he was already with someone; another senior, Tricia Cooper.

Kris seemed pretty nice. I didn’t know much about him, but I’d seen him around school. I never thought he’d be interested in me. Then I asked, “What about Tricia?”

He hesitated and glanced at the floor. “Well … we broke up. Tricia and I aren’t together anymore.”

“Oh,” I replied, studying his gaze. “Sure … sounds good.” My face probably reflected the shock I felt. I was wowed, actually.

“Cool,” Kris beamed at me and turned to leave. He dashed down the hall, nearly mowing down Ms. Perry, the girls’ gym teacher as he called back, “See you tomorrow!”

I stood staring after him as the bell rang, having lost track of time. I had to get to trig class. Well, kid, I thought, someone likes you. Someone actually likes Amanda Fagen. Took long enough.

I put my backpack over my shoulder and headed to class in the now empty hall. Except I hadn’t zipped it shut. Then the most wonderful thing happened … everything inside it spewed every which way!

Glancing around to see if anyone was watching, I bent over to get my stuff. The hall was bare, except for the matron at the end near the exit sign on the lookout for kids trying to cut out of class.

Nice going, I told myself. You just got asked out and the first thing you do is spill your backpack all over the place. I sighed and collected it as fast as I could, and was on my way.

CHAPTER TWO

I gathered up my homework from the dining room table and hopped over to Mom, who was sitting on the sofa. “It’s this problem.” I pointed to an equation in my Trig book.

Just then, my phone beeped and a notification popped up. Kris had just sent me an add on the Book. Smiling, I tapped to accept, and felt a little rush of excitement when I saw his avatar. He was smiling, just as he did that afternoon.

“Amanda, who is that?” Mom peered at my phone.

“Kris Beckley, from school,” I replied. “He asked me out today.” Jenelle, my kid sister, poked her head out of the kitchen. She’s in fifth grade, and enough of a smart aleck to start right in on me.

She raced over to look at my phone. “What does he look like?” I showed her his profile pic. “Woooooo, he’s cute. Kriiiiis likes Amanda!”

“Cut it out,” I rolled my eyes.

“Is he a nice boy?” asked Mom. She keeps an eye on my social media and of course, if I’m going out with someone, she and Dad want to clear that too.

My phone beeped again, and this time it was a video call. Mom nodded so I went to the family room to take it. His face appeared with a big grin. “Hey!” he said.

“Hi,” I replied with a smile. “You move quickly, don’t you?”

“Yeah, well I just wanted to see if you’d like to hang out Friday night.” I glanced around to make sure Jenelle wasn’t lurking, then replied, “Sure … where?”

“How about the movies? Fast Break is playing downtown. Mind if my friend Chuck tags along?” I shrugged and he continued, “my mom is letting me take the car.”

I didn’t know who Chuck was, but it was okay with me. I’d probably have to check with my parents about all of it. “I’ll DM you if I can go,” I told him.

“Awesome,” he said with a wink, “don’t keep me waiting.” And with that, the screen went blank.

CHAPTER THREE

I turned again and there was Jenelle, eagerly waiting for a summary. “Go away,” I waved my hand at her.

“Did he ask you out?” she pried.

“Yup.” I left her standing there and returned to the living room, joining Mom again on the couch, my homework problem forgotten nearby. Dad was sitting in the recliner now, scrolling through some options using the TV remote.

“Could I go out on Friday night?” I asked them.

“Go out where, and with whom?” Dad asked, his eyes not leaving the TV screen.

“With Kris Beckley, the boy who just called me.” I sighed dreamily and closed my eyes. “He wants to go to the movies. We’re going to see Fast Break.”

“Oh no,” Mom piped up, shaking her head. “Last time you went to the movies with a boy, he left with his friend and you were stranded in the parking lot after dark. That is not okay.”

“Mom, he’s driving this time, not a friend,” I pleaded. “He’ll have his parents’ car. And a friend of his happens to be going. Kris is a nice guy; he’d never pull something like that. I’m fifteen, not a baby.” Then I added hopefully, “I can always use the ride app.”

Mom and Dad exchanged glances. “I’m sorry, but your mother is 100% correct, Amanda. Clearly, we erred last time in allowing you to go. Wait until you’re a bit older.” Jenelle was sitting nearby, watching the whole thing.

I was incensed. “Are you kidding me right now?” I grabbed my homework from the sofa and snapped, “Now you’re saying only old people can go on dates.”

Dad’s nostrils flared. “That shows how much respect you have for your elders, young lady,” he barked. “We’ll have none of that attitude in this house.”

I lost control. “You say that because you’re one of them!” My mom gasped as I dashed up to my room. “Let her go,” Dad bellowed. My throat was full of tears as I slammed the door.

I didn’t message Kris. He’d figure it out. There was a soft knock at the door and knew it was Jenelle. “Get LOST!” I shouted, and heard her tiptoe back down the hall.

* * *

The next day, I knew I would see Kris by my locker after Biology. I would explain the whole thing.

Sure enough, I found him standing behind me as I shuffled the stuff in my backpack. He had his hand on the wall and was leaning, balancing himself. His mouth was stretched into a wide grin.

“I didn’t hear from you last night,” he said.

“I know,” I scowled, embarrassed. “My folks won’t let me go. Sorry.”

Kris kept smiling. “No worries … How about, uh … we grab some ice cream after school at Murphy’s? Would your folks mind if I take you?”

I love ice cream … I couldn’t possibly refuse. I was still mad at my parents about the previous night, and I wanted to go. Not that I wanted to piss them off or anything, but it wasn’t at the movies, and it wasn’t at night.

I sent a text to my mother about it. She responded and gave me a strict curfew of 5:00 with a note to not spoil my dinner. “I can go,” I exclaimed.

“Meet you outside in front after school,” he grinned. He whistled loudly as he disappeared around a corner. I was stoked and couldn’t wait for the day to be over.

CHAPTER FOUR

It was raining and I was standing under the eave outside the front of the school. Kris hadn’t shown up yet. My phone read 3:15, a half hour after the buses left.

The rain picked up, and the wind drove a spray where I was standing with a couple of other students waiting for their parents. I started to feel annoyed. Where was he? As the clock inched closer to 3:30, I felt damp and no longer in the mood for ice cream.

I was about to text my mom when I spied Kris, soaked in the rain, dashing toward me.

“Amanda!” he huffed breathlessly, his face flushed. “You’ll never believe what I just went through so that I wouldn’t break our date. I know I’m late,” he joined me under the eave. “I got into a fight with Bud Navarro.” No wonder he looked like crap.

“What happened?” I inquired.

“Bud likes you,” Kris explained, leading me back inside where it was dry. He really looked a mess. “I said I wasn’t going to be at practice after school. He asked me why and I told him we were hanging out … had a date at Murphy’s. Bud went, ‘with Amanda Fagen? Yeah right!’ in a jeering tone, and I asked him what’s his problem and told him to butt out. He shoved me against the lockers.” Kris paused.

“Well, what else happened?” I urged.

“I’m like what the hell, Navarro? and shoved him back … and he charged me and grabbed my head with both hands. I uppercut his jaw and he staggered backward … lost his balance and hit the floor. His mouth was bleeding. Then Coach Dawson came out and saw us.”

“That sucks …” I tried to calm him down. “Sorry.”

“I didn’t wanna get busted for fighting. But he came at me first. Coach hauled both of us into his office, then down to the principal. They called our parents and we’re probably gonna get punished. By the time I got out of Mr. Sweeney’s office, I knew I was late and I took the shortest way here by cutting through the courtyard. Let’s get outta here.”

He put a hand on my arm, willing me to go with him. By that time, it was a quarter to four, and the rain had eased quite a bit. We walked the two blocks to the ice cream place.

As I thought about it, I realized I liked Kris. He fought the most popular guy in school for me, and he’d probably get suspended or something. As we let ourselves inside the ice cream shop, the aroma of sweets and a cool breeze came over us. I was happier by then. I was glad we were together.

* * *

We sat down at a table facing each other, and Kris ordered two hot fudge sundaes from the waitress. He was still pretty much a mess, but that didn’t stop his silly smile. We dug into the feast. I was hungrier than I thought. I didn’t care if my dinner got ruined; this was delicious.

When we were done scraping our bowls, Kris leaned on his elbows and stared into my eyes. “I have something to tell you.” The expression on my face urged him to continue.

He took a deep breath and swept his hair back with his hand. “I’m really into you,” he said, the grin dimming only slightly.

“I’ve always liked you. I’ve sat behind you in Assembly and stood behind you in line in the caf, but you never noticed me. I sat near you in the bleachers during the pep rally and at games. Even when I was with Tricia, I thought of you. You didn’t notice me at all.”

I was suddenly feeling overcome with shyness. “I had no idea, Kris.”

“You wouldn’t guess what gave me the guts to ask you out. Because I don’t know what it was, either,” he added with a chuckle as he took the check. He left a $10 on the table.

I glanced at my phone and it was quarter to five. I knew I had to get home, and I would have to hurry.

“Thanks for the ice cream … but I gotta go!” I was out of my seat and heading for the door before he could react. I didn’t want to mess this up with my parents, who expected me by 5.

I burst out the door, and started running toward home. The rain had started again, and my footsteps squeaked on the wet pavement.

I heard Kris behind me, running and calling “wait! Amanda, wait!” When we reached my block, Kris caught up with me and stopped me as the rain continued drenching us.

I was in his arms, now under a big tree, but I panicked and tried to break free. I had never been liked by a boy before. I hardly knew Kris Beckley.

CHAPTER FIVE

He held me fast. “Let me GO!” I shrieked.

“Hold it! Keep cool … calm DOWN!” he held me close and my panic quieted. I knew my face was a mess of tears, rain and smudged dirt. I was fuming at myself for acting so babyish in front of Kris just because he liked me that way. I turned my face away from his in shame.

“Shhhh … Amanda … try this … you’ll feel better.” He let me go and reached into his jacket pocket. His hand came back out, holding a half-smoked joint.

Taken aback, I knew exactly what it was, stared at it and then at Kris. He was calm and smiling again, under the tree, in the rain. “Really, it will help. Try it, Amanda.”

I backed away slowly. “I don’t want it.”

“Please … it chills me out when I take a couple of hits. It’s just a harmless friend of mine.” His voice was soft and soothing. He tempted me, holding the joint, and I studied his face. I suddenly felt more comfortable, and braver than before. I’d forgotten all about the time.

* * *

We strolled in the opposite direction now, and Kris led me to the lot behind the Sav-a-Buck, and we sat on the ground under the overhang of a dock. Being there with Kris made it all okay again, even though we were soaked and in the puddles.

Huddled next to me, Kris snatched a lighter from his pocket. He put the joint into his mouth and raised the flame to the burned end. It lit, and Kris leaned back against the wall with ease as he took a drag. He sighed and puffed again, and closed his eyes.

“Amanda … here.” With fog in his eyes, he pulled the joint from his lips and handed it to me. I hesitantly took it, and held the damp end where he’d smoked from.

Is this the Amanda who was running home for curfew not too long ago? I thought. What about Mom and Dad? They’ll be pissed.

But my mind was filled with knowing that if I did this, I’d probably be accepted not only by Kris, but by his friends as well. I wondered whether Tricia smoked pot with him. I slowly lifted the joint to my mouth.

“That’s it … take a nice long drag. Thaaaat’s it.” I did, and went into a coughing fit. I returned the butt to him and choked. When I finished gasping, he lit another one and handed it to me. “Try again … you’ll like it. I promise.”

I took it from him and puffed on it, this time a smaller breath. I didn’t cough as much, and began to feel a sensation of calm, almost like being in another world … a chill place, as he’d said. I took a couple more drags, then gave it back to him.

Kris sucked in on the joint, and we lay back against the wall, giggling. I didn’t care if anyone came out on the dock and caught us. We just sat there, laughing together.

Kris then gathered me into his arms, this time I went willingly … and he kissed me. Our makeout was so … awesome. I felt so close to him then. Lost in him. The butts now stubbed out in the puddles, our kisses were passionate.

Dark was starting to fall. We lay there laughing again. I glanced at my phone then, and it was blown up with texts from Dad. Crap. I knew I was in for it. Even though I felt the high of being with Kris, I knew I’d better get home. Now. I texted back:

sorry!!! lost track of time. home soon.

I hoped it would be enough … but I had my doubts.

CHAPTER SIX

Kris walked me home, but disappeared into the darkness once I got to the door. The street lights were on. I turned the handle and crept into the foyer.

I took off my wet shoes, and slowly climbed the stairs that led to the living room. Jenelle was in her pajamas, playing a game on her tablet.

“Where are Mom and Dad?” I casually asked, trying to act as if this was just another evening after school. No one could ever know about what Kris and I did earlier.

“They’re waiting for you in the family room,” she announced. She stared at me. “Whatcha been doing, Mandy? You look really bad.”

I knew I did, but didn’t explain. “I’m fine,” I said. “I’m going to wash up. I’ll be back.”

I changed my clothes and did what I could with my hair, stringy and plastered to my head. When I thought I looked presentable, I calmly went downstairs to see my parents.

* * *

Suffice it to say that Mom and Dad were not pleased. At all. Dad demanded that they meet Kris if I were ever to see him again.

I’m not sure they bought my story about losing track of the time and just getting caught in the rain. I added that at least he’d walked me home, and apologized again profusely.

Once I got to my room, I shut the door and locked it, turning on my bedside lamp. It gave a dim light, just enough to make the room feel cozy.

I lay back on my bed, and blinked as I stared at the ceiling. My mind still felt foggy, and I knew I’d dodged a bullet with my parents. I thought for sure they’d ground me.

I thought about the day’s incidents, playing them over in my mind. This morning, I was a perfect kid with a clean conscience. Now, I believed I’d fallen in love, and had experienced something daring and cool with my new boyfriend.

My stomach fluttered thinking about the makeout with Kris. He knew what he was doing … not his first rodeo for sure. I felt bad for Tricia that he was mine now, well maybe a little bit. Marijuana was actually pretty nice, too.

I turned over, and the next thing I knew, I awoke in my clothes and the sun was up.

* * *

Going to school that day was like a holiday for me. I was so carefree and happy, because I knew that when school let out, Kris and I would head back to Sav-a-Buck and smoke and make out.

Even though I awoke very tired, I felt fine. Fantastic, actually. Even the Biology exam didn’t ruin my day, and I thought I got at least a C. All through the day, my mind was on the three fresh joints tucked in a hidden pocket of my backpack.

The only downer was finding out that Kris had definitely gotten busted for the fight with Bud Navarro. Since it was self-defense, they both were suspended; Kris for a day, and Bud for a week (out of school). He’d gone at Kris, so he deserved everything he got.

It felt weird to know that the fight was about me and that Bud actually liked me too. He didn’t have to be a jerk about it, though.

We had a blast that afternoon, but I didn’t stay too long … an hour or so. I wasn’t about to catch it with my parents again. I thought of cutting out classes the next day to hang out with Kris, but then decided against it because of that. I’d just have to toe the line if I was going to keep seeing him.

“Amanda,” he hugged me at my locker that afternoon. “Yesterday was awesome. Even with the rain,” he said, leaning in for a kiss.

I smiled up at him, and kissed back. We hugged, and with another kiss, he winked and headed off to his next class.

I stood there in a daze as kids swarmed about in the hall, and gazed after him. I realized with a jolt that this was happening way too fast. I had to stop myself.

He knew that I had a curfew the other day, and that I needed to get home. Yet, he lured me away and introduced me to the world of smoking pot, and made out with me, all while knowing my parents would be flipping out.

I was now standing near my locker feeling like I’d been kicked in the stomach by a horse. I wondered whether the reason Kris was all-in was because he just wanted someone to get buzzed with.

CHAPTER SEVEN

Now don’t get the impression I didn’t care about Kris. I did. I couldn’t deny that this was crazy and we could both get in a lot of trouble.

I checked his social media page, and his profile was set to “in a relationship.” I got a little rush from that.

Some people had posted asking about the fight, and he let them know why it happened. He got a bunch of Likes and some questions. Bud didn’t comment anything on the post … probably embarrassed, as well he should be.

We hung out after school a few times behind the Sav-a-Buck, under the ledge, now “our space.” There were no deliveries made when we were there, and no one caught us.

I got a call from Kris one night and asked me out to drive to Schooner Point on Saturday night with him, a beautiful lake where you can have a campfire. And make out, of course … and maybe smoke.

“At night?” I responded, remembering the conniption my parents had.

“Sure,” came his reply. “We can drag a little and be alone and just hang out.”

I thought fast. It sounded amazing. Mom and Dad were to be out all evening, and Jenelle was going to a sleepover. It was perfect. “Yeah,” I answered, “I’m down with that.”

“Awesome,” came his voice. “I’ll be there around 8 with the car. Be ready.”

“I will,” I whispered, and ended the call. Alone at night, with Kris — and nobody had to know about it, as long as I got home before my folks did.

I was so excited. I went over to my dresser and stared at myself in the mirror. Amanda Fagen, you did all right. Handsome Kris Beckley wanted to be with me. This overrode my misgivings about the speed of our relationship.

The night Kris came to get me was a beautiful one. It was a mild spring evening and the breeze was soft. The stars were out and the rising moon shone full and round.

I was waiting for him on my porch wearing a light windbreaker when he drove up in his parents’ late model Cadillac CTS. Kris tapped the horn lightly, and I made sure the front door was locked before bounding out to the car.

Smiling, I climbed in on the passenger side and nestled into the plush seat. “Hey,” I greeted.

He leaned over and we kissed. “Did you bring some weed?” I asked as he eased the car out into the street.

“Enough for an army.”

“Good.” I snuggled up to him as he drove, feeling happy.

* * *

Kris turned onto a dark road off the main highway and sped on with high beams blazing. Then, he made a right onto a dirt road, and after about a half-mile of bumps and shakes, Kris steered through a clearing in some bushes. He finally brought the Caddy to a stop in an open space in front of the lake.

He shifted into Park and cut the ignition, then turned to me in the darkness. “Whaddaya wanna do, Amanda?” he asked.

He’d asked me here, I thought, puzzled. “Well let’s get out,” I suggested.

“Okay.” We climbed out into the clear night and Kris escorted me to the edge of the lake. We sat down at a picnic table, and I was mesmerized watching the moonlight ripple on the water, and he put his arm around me.

Soon, we were kissing and his arms enveloped me, pulling me in as close as possible. I felt a little jolt from being so close, and seemed to melt blissfully into him. I could kiss him forever.

I wanted to … but I knew then that this is how people could get in a terrible jam. I forced myself away.

We sat silently watching the lake for a bit. It seemed like he was thinking of something. “Light one up,” I said.

Kris reached into his pocket and lit a fresh joint, and took a long drag before handing it over to me. I puffed and settled back against him, and we shared it back and forth until it was spent.

A hawk suddenly screeched overhead and startled us, and we both broke out laughing. We used up another joint and began kissing again. We laughed at everything possible. I cracked up at the moon. We shivered with laughter in the cool night.

I was used to pot smoke now. It made regular cigarette smoke smell alien, and that always gave me a headache. I was content and having a great time.

Kris handed me a few more joints. “These are to hold you over until next time. Think of me when I’m not around.” I tucked them into my jeans pocket, not knowing what he meant. I’d only smoked when I was with him.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Kris led me to some grass nearby, and we lay staring up at the stars. Kris rolled over and gathered me into his arms again, and leaned in for the best makeout yet. He hadn’t shaved, and I could feel my mouth getting raw … and I didn’t want to stop.

As high as we were, I was still completely aware of what was going on; I was just super chill and in the moment.

Then, Kris pulled a stunt. I felt his sweaty hands slip up my shirt and under my bra, and he groped me and kissed me deeply, moaning in delight.

“Kris … Kris! What are you doing?! NO!” I squirmed out of his embrace and fixed my shirt. He looked shocked.

I got up and, flinging off my sneakers and socks, waded out into the lake. Kris got up and ran to join me in the water, and tried to feel me up again.

I was sure that by that time, Kris had no idea what he was doing. How the hell would he drive us home? He was definitely more far gone than I was.

I pushed him away so forcefully that I ejected myself backward into the cold water. I briefly went under the surface, and I sensed him coming toward me again.

I righted myself, and headed for shore. I’d had enough. I flopped back on the grass and he joined me. We were both soaking wet, a throwback to our first time together, and I was in his arms again, but I didn’t push him away. I felt sleepy. I wanted to just lie there and rest.

We lay there under the stars. Kris kissed me, and then we both passed out.

* * *

I was awakened by the call of a dove, and rubbed my eyes, feeling chilly. It was morning at Schooner Point.

I sat up with a start. “Kris!” I shook him several times. He twitched and opened his eyes.

“Holy crap.” He got to his feet. “I gotta get the car home!” I scrambled to get my shoes and socks, strewn off to the side, putting them on. I hastily brushed dirt and sand off my clothes.

We stumbled to the waiting Cadillac. Kris peeled in reverse, into a K turn, and shot forward through the opening in the bushes. Soon we were back on the dirt road, then on the highway in the direction of home.

He glanced at his phone. “Damn it,” he grumbled, pounding the wheel. “I’m gonna catch hell.” The drive was silent from there on.

Kris dropped me off without a word, and when I shut the door, he gunned it and disappeared down the street.

Stunned, I turned to look toward my house. The blinds upstairs were down and I knew my folks were still asleep; that is, if they hadn’t waited up for me.

I looked like a drowned rat again, but this time, I felt really crappy. My stomach was upset. I knew I was screwed.

My phone was missing … probably slipped out of my pocket in the lake last night. I imagined all the texts and calls from my parents that I’d probably missed.

At least Jenelle was still at the sleepover and wouldn’t witness this going down. No lie would fly this time. I was in for it, and knew I deserved whatever I got.

Digging in my pocket, I found I still had my house key. I quietly turned the door knob, bracing for the worst. It had been his idea to go out, but it was my call whether I went, and how I handled things at the lake. I had to own that.

CHAPTER NINE

As expected, Mom and Dad were flipping furious. I was grounded to my room for a month, could not use the phone or computer, and couldn’t watch TV … no radio, either.

Mom had found a roach under some paperbacks in my nightstand. She tore apart my room after that, but didn’t find anything else.

I was sunk, and took my punishment. I had no explanation but the truth. I was forbidden to see Kris.

His words echoed in my mind … “I gotta get the car home! ” That was his concern, not me. The car. And his own neck, not mine. I was angry with Kris now. He’d said he liked me, but did he actually care about me?

The next night, Mom, Dad, and Jenelle went to a family party. I was not allowed to go with them. With no phone or access to the computer, I had no choice but to stay off social media.

The joints from my jeans pocket were pulp, so I flushed those. I knew I still had a small bag of weed, rolling paper, and a lighter in a sock at the back of my closet, pinned into an old Halloween costume. I’d also hid the joints from my backpack there, and looked forward to when my family left so I could have a smoke after dark.

After pouring myself a soda, I went out back behind our shed. I was perfectly concealed between that and the corner of the fence, and had just enough light to do what I’d planned.

I sat Indian-style and arranged everything on my World History book. I took out a piece of rolling paper, put a few pinches of marijuana on it, and started to roll it tight. When I’d created a cylinder, I licked the edge and pressed it carefully. Kris had taught me how to do this. I was prepared to chill on my own for the evening.

I pulled out the lighter and lit the joint, puffing hard. I let it rest in my lungs before exhaling. The night was quiet and mild. I felt at ease there by myself.

When I was done, I headed inside and flushed the roach down the toilet, then finished my soda. In a daze, I flopped on my bed, head spinning, suddenly feeling upset with myself. My stomach was on board with that, too.

I couldn’t think clearly, and I was anxious about school the next day. I closed my eyes and drifted off into a fitful slumber, and didn’t hear my family return home later that night.

CHAPTER TEN

I was stuck being grounded, but knew Kris would be at school; there’s no way my parents could have prevented that. I wanted to avoid him, however. I didn’t want to see him. He’d been a jerk, and a careless one, and I’d gotten in serious trouble.

He cornered me by my locker first thing and I froze, feeling a flash of annoyance. “Amanda … I’m sorry,” he began.

He turned up my face toward his, forcing me to look into his eyes. “I mean it. I screwed up. I was a jackass. Please, believe me.”

“I’m grounded, Kris,” I growled. “Do you have any idea of the crapload I caught when I got home?”

He sighed and looked away. “I know. I KNOW.” He punched the locker, startling everyone around us, and I felt embarrassed.

His hand was sore now, and he gripped it with the other, and I was glad that he’d hurt himself. He’d said how sorry he was, but in the light of day, he didn’t care about me. My suspicion was right all along … he just wanted someone to drag and make out with.

I didn’t think I wanted to go on with this relationship. I hadn’t slept well the previous night, thinking about everything, and knew something had to change.

I turned and slammed my locker shut, slinging my backpack over my shoulder. “Amanda, I said I was sor–” he began.

“Get outta my face!” I pushed past him. I didn’t want to hear anything else. The bell sounded and he lunged my way, trying to stop me, but missed as I darted through a group of kids. He obviously didn’t have a clue what I was really upset about.

“Amanda! Wait!” he shouted down the hall. I knew his eyes were glued to me as I turned the corner.

EPILOGUE

For the rest of the day, we avoided each other. I hoped Kris got the message.

I thought long and hard about where my life was going, and I just knew I didn’t want him included anymore, and I was done with smoking pot. It was all about him, anyway.

The trust of my parents and my future were too much to gamble with. I had just started looking at colleges, and didn’t want to mess that up.

I didn’t give a rap what Kris Beckley thought, because it was obvious where his priorities were. It occurred to me that Tricia had probably dumped him. Girl was right on the money, if that was the case.

That day, I went up to my room and took my stash out of the closet, hiding it in my backpack. I would get rid of it tomorrow.

* * *

The next day, I left a little earlier than usual and walked toward the Sav-a-Buck. I rounded the corner of the building toward the Dumpsters. I saw the ledge where Kris and I had been and felt a slight twinge of regret, because after all, we did have fun together.

I knew I’d have to do this before I lost my nerve. I got the stuff out, and quietly dropped the bag into the opening, and heard a soft thunk as it hit bottom.

There, it was done … I was done. I turned on my heel and headed out of the lot, toward school.

Running into Kris during the day wasn’t a problem anymore, because he obviously knew it was over.

The following weekend, my parents bought me a new phone. I could use it only for calls and texts; no social media or Internet privileges.

We were back on an even keel, on the level all the way. I did my homework when I got home every day, and helped with the dishes and whatever else. I said I was sorry … for everything, and they knew I meant it.

Jenelle came to my room one night and asked me what happened. I simply replied that things didn’t work out. Being with Kris was fun … until it stopped being fun. It was all behind me now.

On the upside, Bud Navarro approached me at school after lunch and asked me out … to his younger brother’s birthday party. Not much more innocent than that.

He came to our door to meet my parents, and really impressed them. I went, and had pizza and cake, and we played games. He drove us in his own car, a much older one than Kris’ parents’ Cadillac.

I found out Bud is actually a pretty nice guy, excepting the fight. He thought Kris was punching above his weight with me, and knowing what I knew now, I couldn’t disagree with him. He apologized for getting them both suspended … he admitted that was a total jerk move.

Things with Bud looked good. School was going well, and my home life was much better. It had been a learning experience, I guess. That’s all life is. From then on, I was going to give it my best shot.

When I get my social media back, I’ll be updating my relationship status!